Wednesday, November 29, 2006

A Theory

I came up with this theory the other day, and to tell you the truth, I'm pretty happy with it.

Chicks with big lips have big tits.

I've come up with a list of 5 people that this applies to. Yes, this theory is bulletproof.

* Please note that my theory works one way and one way only (i.e my way) so it can't be reversed and tampered with (i.e people being 'smart' and saying the theory should work in reverse).

Thursday, November 23, 2006

Rhetorical Greetings

This issue has honestly bugged me since about 1996. Don't get me wrong, I haven't been sitting here for 10 years shaking my fists in fury, but WHY do people say 'how are ya.. alright?'. Why bother asking someone how they are if you're going to answer for them? It then becomes a rhetorical question, yet you would be rude not to answer. So what do you say? 'Good.. yes?'

Monday, November 20, 2006

Organic my arse

I'm sooo over this organic craze that seems to be sweeping Adelaide. Don't get me wrong. I am ok with organic fruit and vegetables. But organic alcohol? Organic chocolate? C'mon people, that's just plain stoopid.

Now, call me crazy but don't people consume organic produce because it's healthy for you? As much as I would like this to be true, chocolate and alcohol isn't good for you. Even if it is organic.

Sunday, November 12, 2006

I'm in love....

With gerkins.

I know. I've obviously been living under a rock for quite some time. Imagine going through 25 years of non gerkin lovin'? Think of all those 80's/90's birthday parties I went to and totally went for the honey crackles instead of the Jatz with cheese and gerkin!

And why oh why did I take the gerkins out of my cheeseburgers at Macca's? WHHHYYY? Because that's what everyone else did. And I'll take responsibility for being a sheep but mark my words, those sweet (kind of sour) little green gremlins will be going into my mouth at every opportunity from now on. Preferably with cheese. Mmmm, cheese cubes.

Friday, November 03, 2006

I had a dream....

Now, I'm not claiming to be the next Martin (or Martha in my case) Luther King, but man, I had a dream and it came true. Well, let me re phrase that. I have had numerous dreams about this particular subject and well, in the past, nothing happened. Please, don't get all excited. I haven't thought of a cure for anything or decided I want to dedicate myself to opening a hat shop, but I did have a dream.

Let me take you back to maybe, June, this year. Insert that blurp blurp thing they do in 70's sitcoms......While I was overseas I dreamt that I could jog. Just to explain, I have had this dream A LOT of times. Some people dream they are superheros, some people have weird kinky dreams....and me, I dream I can jog. I'm not doing anything Olympic, just jogging on the road, I think I am usually wearing leggings which is sooooooo not what I would EVER wear in real life, but you know, it's a dream. Hold on, I can't really remember where I am going with this.....oh yea. So anyway, I came back from overseas and now I can jog. Not that I am obese, but I think I can relate to the contestants on the Biggest Loser. Stay with me here...they have a dream to be skinny and jog to do it, I had a dream to jog and I jogged to do it. We are so the same. I feel really inspirational now. Maybe I should organise a fun run or something.

Wow, I haven't blogged in ages, and when I do, it's pure quality kids.